Today was busy and filled with running around, but I am finally home! I finally went to the doctor and got a pap and talked with him about TTC. I told him about how we started last year in Nov. and have been trying since February since Chris got back, I told him about how my periods sometimes did not show up, I told him everything! At first I didn't think he would really worry about me because I have one child already and I barely turned 21, but boy was I wrong! I am in love! After my pap, we talked in his office and he was extremely helpful and knowledgeable and drew everything out for me. He explained and showed me why it was not good that my period had disappeared for 4 months and let me know that each time I did not have a period that I could have developed cysts on my ovaries. He said that if they get too bad, they sometimes twist and could make a blockage to my fallopian tubes. He scheduled an ultrasound to rule this out. My pap came out good and he said that everything from that prospective looked great.He told me that he was definitely not worried about me in the aspect that I could not get pregnant because I already had Wes and he was sure he could help me conceive again.
Then came the part that totally surprised me. He said he was prescribing me 4 medicines. The first would be what I am already taking which are prenatal vitamins, the second would be a medicine to stabilize my metabolism (Metformin) , another to take if my period did not show up (progesterone), which I would only then take BEFORE taking a pregnancy test because it would hurt the baby if I took it and I was pregnant, the last which totally took me off guard when I read it, clomid! I was really surprised that he would prescribe me that, but I am not complaining. He was mad that he didn't see me before my period started, but he's glad that I can take it this month, if I am not pregnant. He told me that he was no doubts that I will be pregnant in 3 months. I am so excited! To me it doesn't matter how I get pregnant, I just want to have another baby. Something that a girl posted on my secondary infertility page is this and I love it:
Thursday, September 29, 2011
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
The Past few days. . .
I am extremely proud to say that Wes is 100% potty trained; finally at 2 years && 10 months!!! He is wearing his "big-boy" underwear along with his pants, even around the house. That may sound weird, but as I have said in my previous blogs, the 3 day potty training system says that it would take 3 months for the child to be able to wear pants at home and underwear under his pants when out. I am so proud to say Wes is able to be in his pants and underwear when at home and out & about and still let me know when he has to potty. I have not changed a diaper in 5 days!! Ah-mazing! I still put a diaper on him at night, but he has yet to wet one(: So, this led me to store all his diapers and liners away; except for 7 for nighttime use. If he continues to not wet the bed at night for another 2 to 3 months, I'll eliminate the diapers all together(: I am even more ready for another precious baby because now we would have only 1 in diapers. I am praying it happens very soon!
My 21st birthday was Sunday and yet I don't feel 21 lol. We are celebrating this weekend, so maybe after this weekend I'll feel like I can legally drink haha.
I have my doc appt on Thursday to check me out and see if I am okay to have another baby; I am so excited and a little nervous. I hope everything checks out. I am praying about it and I trust everything will be fine.
Now, I am just making a mushroom pasta, yummy! Waiting for the hubby to get home!
That's all my ramblings for today(:
My 21st birthday was Sunday and yet I don't feel 21 lol. We are celebrating this weekend, so maybe after this weekend I'll feel like I can legally drink haha.
I have my doc appt on Thursday to check me out and see if I am okay to have another baby; I am so excited and a little nervous. I hope everything checks out. I am praying about it and I trust everything will be fine.
Now, I am just making a mushroom pasta, yummy! Waiting for the hubby to get home!
That's all my ramblings for today(:
Friday, September 23, 2011
Adventures in Potty Training:III
So, as I stated last night, Wes went to bed with big boy undies! No cloth diaper! He did climb out of bed really quick before bed and I was wondering why. He was headed to the potty, but didn't make it. At least he tried to get to the potty though. I am extremely proud to say that he DID NOT wet the bed during the night!! I cut off his liquids around 8:30pm and no bed wetting! I was totally surprised especially since it was his first night working on potty training.
When he woke up this morning, I took him straight to the potty and he was a little irritated because there I am pulling off his pants early morning, so he did a little tinkle in his undies. Like the 3 day system says, I just told him in a disappointed voice that PeePee goes in the potty. After that accident, he would just randomly run to the potty and use it, we celebrated often and he got an M& each time.
Later we were in the kitchen cooking and I had him on the counter and he told me that he had to PeePee, but when I went to put him down he told me no. I sat him back on the counter and a minute later he had trickled on the counter! I was so irritated, but it was my fault because he did tell me. I just explained again that peepee goes in the potty.
He did great all today besides his 2 accidents and one accident he had on Chris! LMAO! I told Chris that he shouldn't tickle him because he is due for a potty break, but of course Chris did not listen. Wes peed on him a little and we all laughed! Wes finished on the potty, but it was absolutely hilarious!
Now, he is in bed with no diaper again and we will see how the night goes! I do have to say that I think he will have an accident only because he fell asleep before his bedtime and he did not have time to empty his bladder. I am not worried either way, he has a pee pad underneath so if he does it's not the end of the world. I am so proud of my baby boy!!
Update:
Wes work up at around 9pm and he had NOT wet the bed and used it when he woke up. I knew he probably would wake-up because he can't go to bed that early. I am so proud he held his pee and used the potty when he woke up! YES!!
When he woke up this morning, I took him straight to the potty and he was a little irritated because there I am pulling off his pants early morning, so he did a little tinkle in his undies. Like the 3 day system says, I just told him in a disappointed voice that PeePee goes in the potty. After that accident, he would just randomly run to the potty and use it, we celebrated often and he got an M& each time.
Later we were in the kitchen cooking and I had him on the counter and he told me that he had to PeePee, but when I went to put him down he told me no. I sat him back on the counter and a minute later he had trickled on the counter! I was so irritated, but it was my fault because he did tell me. I just explained again that peepee goes in the potty.
He did great all today besides his 2 accidents and one accident he had on Chris! LMAO! I told Chris that he shouldn't tickle him because he is due for a potty break, but of course Chris did not listen. Wes peed on him a little and we all laughed! Wes finished on the potty, but it was absolutely hilarious!
Now, he is in bed with no diaper again and we will see how the night goes! I do have to say that I think he will have an accident only because he fell asleep before his bedtime and he did not have time to empty his bladder. I am not worried either way, he has a pee pad underneath so if he does it's not the end of the world. I am so proud of my baby boy!!
Update:
Wes work up at around 9pm and he had NOT wet the bed and used it when he woke up. I knew he probably would wake-up because he can't go to bed that early. I am so proud he held his pee and used the potty when he woke up! YES!!
Thursday, September 22, 2011
Adventures in Potty Training: II
Today was the 1st day that I actually intensely worked on potty training with Wes, since he was 20 months old. It went great! I did not expect it to be so, but he has done a fantastic job today!
We went swimming today, so after I changed his diaper from last night, I put his big boy underwear on and we headed to the pool.
We came back and I researched the 3-day potty training system. I am going to religiously stick to it. As its states, Wes has only been wearing a shirt and no pants since and it has worked wonderfully. Last time I tried this he just peed on the floor, but I have moved his potty in the living room and he's gone on it all day. I have not used one cloth diaper today. I am thrilled!! We watched the free potty training video that I received in the mail, so each time he goes in the potty we celebrate by doing the potty dance! I cannot tell you how excited I am!! Tonight, I will even put his big boy underwear on for bed because I am cutting off his fluids, so he should use the bathroom and not have to go till the morning. =)
I'll let you know how it turns out tomorrow!
Goal is to have him potty trained in 2 months by his 3rd birthday!!
We went swimming today, so after I changed his diaper from last night, I put his big boy underwear on and we headed to the pool.
We came back and I researched the 3-day potty training system. I am going to religiously stick to it. As its states, Wes has only been wearing a shirt and no pants since and it has worked wonderfully. Last time I tried this he just peed on the floor, but I have moved his potty in the living room and he's gone on it all day. I have not used one cloth diaper today. I am thrilled!! We watched the free potty training video that I received in the mail, so each time he goes in the potty we celebrate by doing the potty dance! I cannot tell you how excited I am!! Tonight, I will even put his big boy underwear on for bed because I am cutting off his fluids, so he should use the bathroom and not have to go till the morning. =)
I'll let you know how it turns out tomorrow!
Goal is to have him potty trained in 2 months by his 3rd birthday!!
Shots, Shots, Shots
When Wes was a baby, I didn't think twice about NOT getting his shots, or even only getting some of his shots. Some will think that I was ONLY 18 and what did I know about stuff like that. Well, I knew that my mother always got me the shots that were appropriate for my age; with Wes having my pediatrician when he was born, I did not think twice about second guessing the doctor I most respected and trusted.
Fast-forward to now: I am reading all this information of shots linked to SIDS, shots linked to autism, and shots linked to delayed learning etc. I am horrified and to say the least extremely thankful that Wes did not have any of these reactions. I am looking at the one vaccine that some parents are saying that is linked to SIDS, DTap- Diphtheria Tetanus and Pertussis Vaccines. I am looking at Wes's shot record and he has had 4 of these vaccines so far, and is supposed to have 2 more, as there are 2 blanks left still to be filled out. After reading these reports, numerous blogs, and articles, I am extremely skeptical of continuing with vaccines for him, especially DTap. He has his 3 year old shots due on Nov. 6th and I cannot tell you that I am gonna be all for it. I am still going to do research and see what I will do with him and my future children. I can say that I am less concerned because both my husband and I have had all our vacs and never had a reaction to any, nor are we allergic to anything. I could not forgive myself if my child were to be affected by a routine shot, nor would I be able to forgive myself if he were to be affected by NOT getting a certain vaccine. Although, Wes has had every vaccine that he will have another dose of, I will continue to do research before he is due in about 2 months. I will pray about the decision and asked to be shown guidance.
Fast-forward to now: I am reading all this information of shots linked to SIDS, shots linked to autism, and shots linked to delayed learning etc. I am horrified and to say the least extremely thankful that Wes did not have any of these reactions. I am looking at the one vaccine that some parents are saying that is linked to SIDS, DTap- Diphtheria Tetanus and Pertussis Vaccines. I am looking at Wes's shot record and he has had 4 of these vaccines so far, and is supposed to have 2 more, as there are 2 blanks left still to be filled out. After reading these reports, numerous blogs, and articles, I am extremely skeptical of continuing with vaccines for him, especially DTap. He has his 3 year old shots due on Nov. 6th and I cannot tell you that I am gonna be all for it. I am still going to do research and see what I will do with him and my future children. I can say that I am less concerned because both my husband and I have had all our vacs and never had a reaction to any, nor are we allergic to anything. I could not forgive myself if my child were to be affected by a routine shot, nor would I be able to forgive myself if he were to be affected by NOT getting a certain vaccine. Although, Wes has had every vaccine that he will have another dose of, I will continue to do research before he is due in about 2 months. I will pray about the decision and asked to be shown guidance.
Monday, September 19, 2011
Adventures in Potty Training
WARNING: THIS IS "SUCH" A MOMMY BLOG, SO READ AT YOUR OWN RISK=)
So, on this momentous day, potty training of epic proportions happened. Wes, for the very first time ever, pooped in the potty willingly (he has peed many times) at 2 years && 10 months. I was watching "Border Wars" on Netflix and I thought I heard Wes playing with his cloth diaper wipe sprayer, so I got up and turned the corner and there he was with red in his eyes. I obviously knew what he was doing/about to do, so I asked him if he needed to potty and he said yes (wow! cause he always fights me) that he had to poo poo and it hurt. I led him to the potty and we sat there for a little bit then sploosh! The biggest turd probably ever made by a toddler goes landing in the potty! I am so proud! We sang our potty song and he got a sticker! He loves it and I know this is a great step towards using the potty!!!!
Wes at 2 years && 10 months using the potty
for poo poo for the first time(=
I'll wait my turn until it's our turn to dance
So, Aunt Flow paid me a visit yesterday. I was bummed at first, but then I realized that hey, at least my period is actually making an appearance. The past few months Aunt Flow hasn't even bothered to make a visit every month. So first, I should look at that as a complete blessing and I am. For those that are like, what? She's sad her period showed up? I was sad because we have made the decision to add to our family.
The plan was (the plan was determined when Wes was an infant) to start trying for a baby when Wes turned 18 months. Well, of course plans change and in our case the Army changed up our plans. Chris was not supposed to deploy until 2011 because the unit that he was assigned to had just gotten back from a 15 month deployment, so I was not worried at all. At that time, it was middle of March 2009 and Wes was not even a year old yet. A few months later, I think around October 2009, Chris came home with some news. He was going to be deployed with another unit because they needed more numbers and he hadn't been deployed yet. His unit had just gotten back, so obviously he would be the first choice to be picked. I was devastated to say the least. You hear "deployment" and your heart just stops beating for a second. I was scared especially since there was word he would be sent to Afghan. I knew that wasn't a good place, so I was definitely worried.
My second thought in all of this was how were we going to go about adding to our family? I had already practically gone through a pregnancy, labor, and the first 6 months without my husband (thanks to the Army once again lol), so repeating that adventure was not really on my list of things to do. Wes was 11 months when we decided to hold off for babies until he came back. I was sad, but I knew that it was the best thing.
Fast-forward to November 2010, Chris was home on R&R. We planned to try then because he would not miss much of my pregnancy if I were to get pregnant then. He was coming back in a couple months for good and nothing monumental would have happened with a pregnancy yet. I unfortunately did not ovulate on R&R & I did not conceive.
Fast-forward to February 2011, a few days before Chris came home I ovulated and when he finally did come home, I started my period a few days later. Total bummer, but I wasn't worried because now he would actually be home and we could start seriously trying.
March 2011, came and went, so did Aunt Flow. I think by the time March came I was a little worried and wondering why it was not happening.
Then, April comes with NO period, at first I thought I was pregnant, but many tests confirmed that to be a BFN! May also came with no period and finally June, also with no period! I was extremely peeved and also worried about what was going on with my body. I did not see a doctor, but started working out with my sister while I was in Alabama. A few weeks later after I started working-out, my period finally comes back! I was so SO so excited to see Aunt Flow. Finally, I could start trying and possibly get pregnant soon. My only problem was I would be stuck in Alabama until late August with no sperm lol. Chris was back in Texas.
Finally, September came and I was so excited because finally things were back on track. Well, THE week I was fertile & ovulating, I get a frickin' yeast infection! Just my damn luck! We had sex once that week towards the end of my meds, but I was pretty sure nothing was gonna happen.
That brings us to today! I am officially counting this month as the first month of trying because we are together and will be able to try and my periods are now back on track. Very thankful for that! This will be the last time we will be able to try because Chris will have training next month out of state and he will be missing my ovulation, so if I am not pregnant next month, we will have November and December, then January he is gone again with more training (yay, Army!).
I am definitely NOT worried, the past 2 weeks I feel like I am closer to God with going to mass and actually soaking up what the priest has to say. I told God that I trust in him and believe that when he thinks I am ready to be blessed with another little miracle that he will send them our way. I used to be envious and want to be pregnant so bad that I did not wanna hear people complain about it and hear their crap. Now, I feel like I can be happy for them and still want a baby myself. I know when they complain about morning sickness, backaches, etc, that I will still be thinking that I would give anything to be feeling that way; with a life growing inside of me. But, I'll wait my turn, until it's our turn to dance.
The plan was (the plan was determined when Wes was an infant) to start trying for a baby when Wes turned 18 months. Well, of course plans change and in our case the Army changed up our plans. Chris was not supposed to deploy until 2011 because the unit that he was assigned to had just gotten back from a 15 month deployment, so I was not worried at all. At that time, it was middle of March 2009 and Wes was not even a year old yet. A few months later, I think around October 2009, Chris came home with some news. He was going to be deployed with another unit because they needed more numbers and he hadn't been deployed yet. His unit had just gotten back, so obviously he would be the first choice to be picked. I was devastated to say the least. You hear "deployment" and your heart just stops beating for a second. I was scared especially since there was word he would be sent to Afghan. I knew that wasn't a good place, so I was definitely worried.
My second thought in all of this was how were we going to go about adding to our family? I had already practically gone through a pregnancy, labor, and the first 6 months without my husband (thanks to the Army once again lol), so repeating that adventure was not really on my list of things to do. Wes was 11 months when we decided to hold off for babies until he came back. I was sad, but I knew that it was the best thing.
Fast-forward to November 2010, Chris was home on R&R. We planned to try then because he would not miss much of my pregnancy if I were to get pregnant then. He was coming back in a couple months for good and nothing monumental would have happened with a pregnancy yet. I unfortunately did not ovulate on R&R & I did not conceive.
Fast-forward to February 2011, a few days before Chris came home I ovulated and when he finally did come home, I started my period a few days later. Total bummer, but I wasn't worried because now he would actually be home and we could start seriously trying.
March 2011, came and went, so did Aunt Flow. I think by the time March came I was a little worried and wondering why it was not happening.
Then, April comes with NO period, at first I thought I was pregnant, but many tests confirmed that to be a BFN! May also came with no period and finally June, also with no period! I was extremely peeved and also worried about what was going on with my body. I did not see a doctor, but started working out with my sister while I was in Alabama. A few weeks later after I started working-out, my period finally comes back! I was so SO so excited to see Aunt Flow. Finally, I could start trying and possibly get pregnant soon. My only problem was I would be stuck in Alabama until late August with no sperm lol. Chris was back in Texas.
Finally, September came and I was so excited because finally things were back on track. Well, THE week I was fertile & ovulating, I get a frickin' yeast infection! Just my damn luck! We had sex once that week towards the end of my meds, but I was pretty sure nothing was gonna happen.
That brings us to today! I am officially counting this month as the first month of trying because we are together and will be able to try and my periods are now back on track. Very thankful for that! This will be the last time we will be able to try because Chris will have training next month out of state and he will be missing my ovulation, so if I am not pregnant next month, we will have November and December, then January he is gone again with more training (yay, Army!).
I am definitely NOT worried, the past 2 weeks I feel like I am closer to God with going to mass and actually soaking up what the priest has to say. I told God that I trust in him and believe that when he thinks I am ready to be blessed with another little miracle that he will send them our way. I used to be envious and want to be pregnant so bad that I did not wanna hear people complain about it and hear their crap. Now, I feel like I can be happy for them and still want a baby myself. I know when they complain about morning sickness, backaches, etc, that I will still be thinking that I would give anything to be feeling that way; with a life growing inside of me. But, I'll wait my turn, until it's our turn to dance.
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
A Side of Discipline
So, as a parent, I think we never stop learning, especially when it comes to how we raise our kids. No newborn ever came with a booklet, so essentially we learn as we go. Yes, you can read and research about anything before your child is born, but ultimately you don't know what will work until your child comes into this world and "game on."
I was just reading a few articles on certain forms of discipline. I read one article about why you shouldn't yell at your kids and I think this was an excellent point. This point stated that if your boss where to yell at you everyday, would you respect them more? My answer would be no and I would probably tune them out the more they yelled. So, I am thinking this is why when I do raise my voice with Wes, he doesn't really listen to me.
There was another I read about spanking, and yes spanking is such a controversial topic, but they made good points. It sends a strong message to kids and suggest to them that when we are angry, we hit. I have seen this play out with Wes when I spanked him often. After reading, these articles, I am mainly going to stick with my time-out, but of course if Wes were to do something dangerous I'll do a small spank. I have pretty much thought this was the case and am glad I found some articles to back my thinking up.
Some will say that they were spanked when they were young and they turned out just fine, but did they really? When they get mad, is the first thing they think to do is take their anger out on something or someone. OR, maybe they are a little timid from fear of breaking the rules? I used to think it had no effect on me, but I was wrong. I was spanked and I am not saying what my parents did was wrong because that was the acceptable way of punishment back then. I do know that I am extremely timid and I hate breaking the rules, which could be a good thing, but sometimes it's boring!
I was just reading a few articles on certain forms of discipline. I read one article about why you shouldn't yell at your kids and I think this was an excellent point. This point stated that if your boss where to yell at you everyday, would you respect them more? My answer would be no and I would probably tune them out the more they yelled. So, I am thinking this is why when I do raise my voice with Wes, he doesn't really listen to me.
There was another I read about spanking, and yes spanking is such a controversial topic, but they made good points. It sends a strong message to kids and suggest to them that when we are angry, we hit. I have seen this play out with Wes when I spanked him often. After reading, these articles, I am mainly going to stick with my time-out, but of course if Wes were to do something dangerous I'll do a small spank. I have pretty much thought this was the case and am glad I found some articles to back my thinking up.
Some will say that they were spanked when they were young and they turned out just fine, but did they really? When they get mad, is the first thing they think to do is take their anger out on something or someone. OR, maybe they are a little timid from fear of breaking the rules? I used to think it had no effect on me, but I was wrong. I was spanked and I am not saying what my parents did was wrong because that was the acceptable way of punishment back then. I do know that I am extremely timid and I hate breaking the rules, which could be a good thing, but sometimes it's boring!
Sunday, September 11, 2011
Fluffy, Circumcison, Lessons Learned && 9-1-1
So, it's only been 3 days, but I have so much to say!
First off, on Saturday, I went to my first "fluffy party", it was definitely tons of fun! For those of you who don't know, fluffy is cloth diapers. I know some people have been reading my posts for the last 8 months and thinking, "what? she washes diapers?" Yeah I was washing my cloth diapers lol. Although I started cloth diapering "late in the game" so to speak (Wes was 2 years&&2 months old), I am totally sold on the idea and plan to cloth diaper with the rest of my children! I also plan to use cloth wipes just as soon as I am done using my pampers wipes that I have. I am so pumped about this! I am working on potty training with Wes, but I am definitely not stressing because of the fact I love my fluff lol & he will pick up potty training sooner or later. No one ever went to school with a diaper! I also met a lot of cool mommies that were extremely educated in "natural parenting". I cannot wait for the next fluffy party!
I also want to blab that I am so irritated with hearing that circumcision is mutilating children, which is essentially saying I mutilated my child because I MADE the decision to circumcise MY child. Yes, that's right MY child. I don't care what other parents do with their children unless their mentally or physically harming their child. Yes, I know that some of the frootloops will say "well your abusing your kid by "altering" him". I say that is in no way harming my child. It is choosing to have a medical procedure done to make his life as a male a better one (<----MY OPINION!). I will admit that I was 18 and did not think twice about not having it done. My husband wanted it done and I agreed with it. Now, I am more educated about the fact and would choose to have it done with another son in a heartbeat. Not a second thought about it. I do not harass and belittle others decisions for keeping their son intact, so I would like it if my choice was also respected. Seriously, I don't go around meeting other mommies and find out that their son's aren't circumcised, and think "OMG, that is horrible! ewwww!" I am like ok and go on with my day and eventually go on with my life. If I was discussing with someone about circumcision and told them my son was circumcised then I would expect them to act the same way, as stated above, whether they are for or against it. Just let me state, I am neither for or against circumcision, I would just choose to have all my sons circumcised. That has never been the topic of discussion anyway, and if that's one of the first things you talk with someone about then run far, FAR away! I am passionate about how I raise MY child and I don't go around judging what others choose to do with their children. There was a comparison that highly irritated me comparing the choice of being circumcised to the choice of being able to murder. UM NO! How the heck is that even comparable? I have no words because it is not! Please just stick with what you do and I will stick with what I do. Lastly, presenting information about circumcision or not circumcising is just honky dory! When you start to belittle and make a person feel that you are telling them what they did with their child is wrong and I urge anyone who ever feels like this to walk away! I for one could not walk away because the frootloop was in the car with me & she was pregnant, so I would have felt so bad! Especially since I already feel bad for the child; no, I am totally kidding, but I chose to remain quiet while I was cursing her in my head lol! BTW, I am calling "frootloops" the people who try to make my decision to circumcise my child seem wrong, NOT the people who choose to not circumcise their child.
I am a time-out using-sometimes the situation calls for a spanking-cloth diapering-recycling-co-bedding-sometimes he can sleep in his own bed-believes in breast feeding, but if you can't formula is JUST fine-bribes with ice-cream-a little fast-food won't kill him-let's him get messy, it's what boys do- go ahead, run around barefoot all you want- celebrates when he's finally asleep, but instantly misses his laughter- wants to get every little moment on camera-sometimes looks at a mess and thinks "I'll clean it later"-television won't kill his brain cells- has to have his clothes matching- watches him when he sleeps- paci using-momma. (If I think of more later, I'll add them)
Finally I get to today! The 10 year anniversary of 9-1-1, the single most disastrous terror attack that the United States of America, which killed thousands and brought a country to its knees, has ever seen. For the first time in a LONG time, I went to bed at a decent hour; I think it was either 8 or 9. I did not set an alarm of any kind, just planned to go with the flow of whenever I woke up. I opened my eyes this morning and was not in any way going back to sleep, my body was just not gonna let me. Totally weird because sleep always has my name written all over it! I looked at the clock and it was 9am! Double shocker because I never wake-up this early. Just before anyone is like, but she has a baby! Yes, I have a baby, but my baby is amazing in a way that he sleeps in every day until 10am! It's awesome! Yes, he does go to bed almost always before 10pm. Anyway, I'm like I am totally going to Mass. So I get ready and Chris of course "isn't feeling well", so he goes in the living to take some medicine ie playing his XBOX lmao and I get Wes up and head out the door. I know I have been slacking on getting us to church because one, I miss my childhood church in Alabama. I know that's no excuse, but I feel like I will be cheating on them if I get super involved in this church like I was the one back home. Yes, I know strange, but I love that church! I did attend it for 17 years, and 3 off and on since I lived in Texas. When Wes was baptized, Chris and I made a promise to raise him in the church, which the responsibly falls mainly on me since I'm the Catholic here and I should be the example for Wes in his faith. After today, no excuses I will be in mass every Sunday and then some come hell or high water. Anyway, after that long description; we get to Mass and the readings are being read. They were geared for 9-1-1, but I felt that they were also plausible for another situation in my life. This is where God got my attention:
The priest was going on in his homily about how God forgives us and accepts us in to his kingdom, but then he stated that how can God accept us when we harbor anger, hatred, and vengeance. How could God accept us in the kingdom of heaven; being merciful and forgiving of our sins, yet we couldn't let go and forgive our neighbors that have done sins against us.
"Sirach 27:30-28:7. Anger and wrath, these are abominations, and the sinful man will possess them. He that takes vengeance will suffer vengeance from the Lord, and he will firmly establish his sins. Forgive your neighbor the wrong he has done, and then your sins will be pardoned when you pray. Does a man harbor anger against another, and yet seek for healing from the Lord? Does he have no mercy toward a man like himself, and yet pray for his own sins? If he himself, being flesh, maintains wrath, who will make expiation for his sins? Remember the end of your life, and cease from enmity, remember destruction and death, and be true to the commandments. Remember the commandments, and do not be angry with your neighbor; remember the covenant of the Most High, and overlook ignorance."
I realized today that although so much has been done to me and yes, I did hold anger and vengeance and wish hateful things, that I cannot live like that. If I want God to forgive my sins, I have to forgive others that have done wrong against me. I am going to try my absolute hardest, but it will be a long road and I will struggle because oh my gosh I can hold a damn good grudge, but I will succeed because I have God helping me!
This passage also got my attention and help me to understand that no matter how many times we have been wronged, we must always forgive. In my case, these 2 people who recently wronged are not asking forgiveness, but in my heart, I am working on forgiving them. I know it is not something that will happen over night, but it will happen.
"Matthew 18:21-22 Then Peter approaching asked him, "Lord, if my brother sins against me, how often must I forgive him? As many as seven times?" Jesus answered, "I say to you, not seven times but seventy-seven times."
So from this day forward, I am going to try my darnedest to forgive whatever trials and tribulations come my way and even past ones. I will TRY to not speak bad of these people.
Lastly, the priest also made a fabulous point today! The saying, "We forgive, but we will never forget." He stated something like, more like I will not forgive and I will forever harbor vengeance and hatefulness in my heart. Of course, yes I did not suffer a direct loss on this tragic day, but just food for thought. (Of course these readings were meant for today on 9-1-1).
This blog jumps everywhere but hey, that's just me(:
First off, on Saturday, I went to my first "fluffy party", it was definitely tons of fun! For those of you who don't know, fluffy is cloth diapers. I know some people have been reading my posts for the last 8 months and thinking, "what? she washes diapers?" Yeah I was washing my cloth diapers lol. Although I started cloth diapering "late in the game" so to speak (Wes was 2 years&&2 months old), I am totally sold on the idea and plan to cloth diaper with the rest of my children! I also plan to use cloth wipes just as soon as I am done using my pampers wipes that I have. I am so pumped about this! I am working on potty training with Wes, but I am definitely not stressing because of the fact I love my fluff lol & he will pick up potty training sooner or later. No one ever went to school with a diaper! I also met a lot of cool mommies that were extremely educated in "natural parenting". I cannot wait for the next fluffy party!
I also want to blab that I am so irritated with hearing that circumcision is mutilating children, which is essentially saying I mutilated my child because I MADE the decision to circumcise MY child. Yes, that's right MY child. I don't care what other parents do with their children unless their mentally or physically harming their child. Yes, I know that some of the frootloops will say "well your abusing your kid by "altering" him". I say that is in no way harming my child. It is choosing to have a medical procedure done to make his life as a male a better one (<----MY OPINION!). I will admit that I was 18 and did not think twice about not having it done. My husband wanted it done and I agreed with it. Now, I am more educated about the fact and would choose to have it done with another son in a heartbeat. Not a second thought about it. I do not harass and belittle others decisions for keeping their son intact, so I would like it if my choice was also respected. Seriously, I don't go around meeting other mommies and find out that their son's aren't circumcised, and think "OMG, that is horrible! ewwww!" I am like ok and go on with my day and eventually go on with my life. If I was discussing with someone about circumcision and told them my son was circumcised then I would expect them to act the same way, as stated above, whether they are for or against it. Just let me state, I am neither for or against circumcision, I would just choose to have all my sons circumcised. That has never been the topic of discussion anyway, and if that's one of the first things you talk with someone about then run far, FAR away! I am passionate about how I raise MY child and I don't go around judging what others choose to do with their children. There was a comparison that highly irritated me comparing the choice of being circumcised to the choice of being able to murder. UM NO! How the heck is that even comparable? I have no words because it is not! Please just stick with what you do and I will stick with what I do. Lastly, presenting information about circumcision or not circumcising is just honky dory! When you start to belittle and make a person feel that you are telling them what they did with their child is wrong and I urge anyone who ever feels like this to walk away! I for one could not walk away because the frootloop was in the car with me & she was pregnant, so I would have felt so bad! Especially since I already feel bad for the child; no, I am totally kidding, but I chose to remain quiet while I was cursing her in my head lol! BTW, I am calling "frootloops" the people who try to make my decision to circumcise my child seem wrong, NOT the people who choose to not circumcise their child.
I am a time-out using-sometimes the situation calls for a spanking-cloth diapering-recycling-co-bedding-sometimes he can sleep in his own bed-believes in breast feeding, but if you can't formula is JUST fine-bribes with ice-cream-a little fast-food won't kill him-let's him get messy, it's what boys do- go ahead, run around barefoot all you want- celebrates when he's finally asleep, but instantly misses his laughter- wants to get every little moment on camera-sometimes looks at a mess and thinks "I'll clean it later"-television won't kill his brain cells- has to have his clothes matching- watches him when he sleeps- paci using-momma. (If I think of more later, I'll add them)
Finally I get to today! The 10 year anniversary of 9-1-1, the single most disastrous terror attack that the United States of America, which killed thousands and brought a country to its knees, has ever seen. For the first time in a LONG time, I went to bed at a decent hour; I think it was either 8 or 9. I did not set an alarm of any kind, just planned to go with the flow of whenever I woke up. I opened my eyes this morning and was not in any way going back to sleep, my body was just not gonna let me. Totally weird because sleep always has my name written all over it! I looked at the clock and it was 9am! Double shocker because I never wake-up this early. Just before anyone is like, but she has a baby! Yes, I have a baby, but my baby is amazing in a way that he sleeps in every day until 10am! It's awesome! Yes, he does go to bed almost always before 10pm. Anyway, I'm like I am totally going to Mass. So I get ready and Chris of course "isn't feeling well", so he goes in the living to take some medicine ie playing his XBOX lmao and I get Wes up and head out the door. I know I have been slacking on getting us to church because one, I miss my childhood church in Alabama. I know that's no excuse, but I feel like I will be cheating on them if I get super involved in this church like I was the one back home. Yes, I know strange, but I love that church! I did attend it for 17 years, and 3 off and on since I lived in Texas. When Wes was baptized, Chris and I made a promise to raise him in the church, which the responsibly falls mainly on me since I'm the Catholic here and I should be the example for Wes in his faith. After today, no excuses I will be in mass every Sunday and then some come hell or high water. Anyway, after that long description; we get to Mass and the readings are being read. They were geared for 9-1-1, but I felt that they were also plausible for another situation in my life. This is where God got my attention:
The priest was going on in his homily about how God forgives us and accepts us in to his kingdom, but then he stated that how can God accept us when we harbor anger, hatred, and vengeance. How could God accept us in the kingdom of heaven; being merciful and forgiving of our sins, yet we couldn't let go and forgive our neighbors that have done sins against us.
"Sirach 27:30-28:7. Anger and wrath, these are abominations, and the sinful man will possess them. He that takes vengeance will suffer vengeance from the Lord, and he will firmly establish his sins. Forgive your neighbor the wrong he has done, and then your sins will be pardoned when you pray. Does a man harbor anger against another, and yet seek for healing from the Lord? Does he have no mercy toward a man like himself, and yet pray for his own sins? If he himself, being flesh, maintains wrath, who will make expiation for his sins? Remember the end of your life, and cease from enmity, remember destruction and death, and be true to the commandments. Remember the commandments, and do not be angry with your neighbor; remember the covenant of the Most High, and overlook ignorance."
I realized today that although so much has been done to me and yes, I did hold anger and vengeance and wish hateful things, that I cannot live like that. If I want God to forgive my sins, I have to forgive others that have done wrong against me. I am going to try my absolute hardest, but it will be a long road and I will struggle because oh my gosh I can hold a damn good grudge, but I will succeed because I have God helping me!
This passage also got my attention and help me to understand that no matter how many times we have been wronged, we must always forgive. In my case, these 2 people who recently wronged are not asking forgiveness, but in my heart, I am working on forgiving them. I know it is not something that will happen over night, but it will happen.
"Matthew 18:21-22 Then Peter approaching asked him, "Lord, if my brother sins against me, how often must I forgive him? As many as seven times?" Jesus answered, "I say to you, not seven times but seventy-seven times."
So from this day forward, I am going to try my darnedest to forgive whatever trials and tribulations come my way and even past ones. I will TRY to not speak bad of these people.
Lastly, the priest also made a fabulous point today! The saying, "We forgive, but we will never forget." He stated something like, more like I will not forgive and I will forever harbor vengeance and hatefulness in my heart. Of course, yes I did not suffer a direct loss on this tragic day, but just food for thought. (Of course these readings were meant for today on 9-1-1).
September 11, 2001
Let us never forgot the individuals who lost
their lives on this horrific day 10 years ago
I was 10 years old, the only thing that was supposed to happen was my 11th birthday on the 25th, instead a day that changed a nation. I was sitting in Ms Randall's Art Class when an announcement came over the intercom. She turned the tv on and we saw planes crashing into 2 tall buildings. I did not understand what was going on, only when I got home that afternoon did my parents explain to me what did. I don't think I got the full effect of everything until I was a couple of years older, the only thing I did understand was that it was something truly horrifying.
This blog jumps everywhere but hey, that's just me(:
Thursday, September 8, 2011
Someone is Wishing that this was Happening to Them
Today was nothing special. An ordinary day consisting of half asleep meal preps, silly games, and giggles with my little prince. I washed diapers, picked up the house a bit, and even manged to do a load of laundry. It was not until this evening that I read a blog that broke my heart.
My friend Kim posted a link about mattress wrapping and the lady who wrote it lost a child a few months ago to SIDS. I went back through and read the blog entry stating that she had lost her daughter. It broke my heart. I HATE hearing about loss, whether it be during pregnancy, infant, child, etc. I hate hearing about it. It made me turn my attention to my 2 year old climbing and dragging his soggy crackers all over my semi-new couch. At that moment, the future mess I would evidently have to clean up did not matter to me. The look of my couch did not matter. He was having so much fun, sitting, and chatting anyway; not a worry in the world. My heart swelled and then I felt sadness. This lady could no longer watch her child and swell with pride as she watched her daughter live life. My heart ached for her.
These tragic events that happen always remind me how lucky and blessed I am to have a happy, healthy, lively little boy. Yes, sometimes I do take him for granted, but who doesn't and everyone has, whether they admit it or not. I am going to try and always remind myself that when I am screaming in my head that I want more sleep, irritated about the constant screams of hearing "MOMMY I WANT...", a wrecked house complete with toys happily strewn everywhere, a toilet clogged with blocks, sofas strewn with soggy cracker fingers, or walking around the corner to find my lipstick, which has been transformed into a paint brush on my white walls, I will remember that somewhere, someone is wishing that this was happening to them.
My friend Kim posted a link about mattress wrapping and the lady who wrote it lost a child a few months ago to SIDS. I went back through and read the blog entry stating that she had lost her daughter. It broke my heart. I HATE hearing about loss, whether it be during pregnancy, infant, child, etc. I hate hearing about it. It made me turn my attention to my 2 year old climbing and dragging his soggy crackers all over my semi-new couch. At that moment, the future mess I would evidently have to clean up did not matter to me. The look of my couch did not matter. He was having so much fun, sitting, and chatting anyway; not a worry in the world. My heart swelled and then I felt sadness. This lady could no longer watch her child and swell with pride as she watched her daughter live life. My heart ached for her.
These tragic events that happen always remind me how lucky and blessed I am to have a happy, healthy, lively little boy. Yes, sometimes I do take him for granted, but who doesn't and everyone has, whether they admit it or not. I am going to try and always remind myself that when I am screaming in my head that I want more sleep, irritated about the constant screams of hearing "MOMMY I WANT...", a wrecked house complete with toys happily strewn everywhere, a toilet clogged with blocks, sofas strewn with soggy cracker fingers, or walking around the corner to find my lipstick, which has been transformed into a paint brush on my white walls, I will remember that somewhere, someone is wishing that this was happening to them.
Thank you God for sending me a piece of my heart.
Wes in Montevallo, AL playing in the creek.
He is 2 years&&8months old here.
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